Nerdwatch Episode 2.26: Cocaine is one Helluva Drug

I really do feel like the Brayko fight is one of the biggest missed opportunities in this game. It’s got all the right elements to be truly memorable: a disco floor for a battle arena, a coked-up Russian mobster with a penchant for American 80s culture, and a boss fight set to the tune of Autograph’s classic Turn up the Radio.

It’s just that the actual fighting part of this boss fight is so incredibly, painfully, aggressively stupid.

He starts off by running back and forth on the stage spraying dual submachine guns at you like a really pissed-off version of David Bowie, only occasionally taking a break to dose up on Ziggy Stardust and transform into some kind of unkillable, hyper-fast Russian god and chase you around the map while you flee for your life; I half expected the background music to switch to Yakety Sax during these moments. Then after he comes down off of his invincibility high, he disappears in a flash of light and leaves behind a bunch of grenade-spamming mooks. Then you get to repeat the whole process over again.

Sure, we made it look easy because we’re evil, scheming bastards. But if you do this as your first hub and haven’t messed with the dude’s blow OR upgraded chain shot to the ludicrous levels we have, then this fight is unbelievably maddening. Honestly, the soundtrack is the only thing that makes it even remotely bearable. I guess it just proves that things really do go better with rock.

Also, because we deprived you of it by beating Brayko’s drug-addled ass in the space of a few seconds, here’s that song in full:

God, I miss hair metal. 

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